Song: Sleepy Sea of Indigo and Blue
by Antje Duvekot

WooHoo!
Happy Mayday!

Lights a cigarette

:)

How fun!

Lower Floors
Avoidant, insecure.
She couldn't really make, let alone maintain eye contact, and to actually take in your reaction was like pushing the wrong sides of two magnets together, even if the response pulled a smile from her.

"You flatter me, but I uh…"

That smile didn't linger, wavering over what might be best described as mental glitches like she didn't know if she wanted to just revolt against herself or not.
It was bittersweet, anyway, to feel valued in spite of the fact that she felt she was an irrecoverable mess, but she burned red across her cheeks anyway.

"…well I don't know if it's of the same make. It seems different, fundamentally. I wake up some days with repairs, new parts under blackout labels and this sense in the back of my head that it's in my best interest not to investigate myself too deeply. I got Peregrine to give it a peek — you know pirateware is his specialty…" She indulged herself a little bit of that problem-solver's distraction.

"Yeah, he was more-or-less owned by her. Echo and I watched her put him into this massive black torture-box with all the necessary tools to sustain him. That armor of his is straight-up medieval, from a war decades ago."

Your assessment of Paz sounded bang-on, like she was a clinical psychopath divorced of the basic empathy that she or you may take for granted, such that his feelings were an obstruction, some flaw or illness that impacted his efficiency.

The rest of that opinion, however, caused her to shake her head. Not in denial or negation of your impression, necessarily, but more a healthy dose of uncertainty.

"No I have no idea — he… was not normal. Killed with impunity. I don't know what made him tick, like I can only imagine his sense of injustice, the places he put his mind in order to do what he needed to do, to march to her beat and justify things, but…" She felt sympathy… and fear.

"I just feel guilty. I barley knew him outside of the impossible position he was put in."

Could it be that complicated? Maul was, by all objective measures, burdened with an unthinkable sum of sin for all that he did in the name of… maybe it was noble, but she only knew a small fraction of his crimes and the blood he was drenched in made it hard to correlate against this idea you put forth, that he must have meant quite a bit to her.

But rather than continue to shovel words, meaningless words out into the conversation she just blinked through a slight dampness behind her eyes. Helpless. Shrugging, eager to get the truth out and be transparent and honest with you. "…but that's… that's that. For all of the bullshit in my head and locked away for what I'm assuming is my own safety… the least I can do is give you whatever truth I do have access to. I mean fuck, choom… your own demons are knocking right on your gate, too."

Pads in

Have a wonderful time!

#r-walkres@bwr --KittyBlack@bwr, MarshalColtonMcCallister@bwr & Lucas Greer Reed^@bwr

I love this tradition you have with your friend.
So very nice. Hope you and BI had a great May Day.

gone

lip

fnord

e@vie has started a new game with the following players:
e@vie

" S T A R T G A M E : t r u e "{ " g a m e I d " : " 1 7 1 4 6 3 2 8 6 2 " , " p l a y e r L i s t " : [ " e @ v i e " ] , " r o l l N u m b e r " : 0 , " c u r r e n t P l a y e r " : 0 , " d i c e " : { " f a c e s " : [ 0 , 0 , 0 , 0 , 0 ] , " r e r o l l " : [ t r u e , t r u e , t r u e , t r u e , t r u e ] } , " s c o r e 0 " : { " 1 " : n u l l , " 2 " : n u l l , " 3 " : n u l l , " 4 " : n u l l , " 5 " : n u l l , " 6 " : n u l l , " p l a y e r " : n u l l , " u p _ t o t a l " : n u l l , " b o n u s " : n u l l , " 3 k " : n u l l , " 4 k " : n u l l , " s s " : n u l l , " l s " : n u l l , " f h " : n u l l , " y a h _ t o k e n " : n u l l , " y " : n u l l , " c " : n u l l , " y a h _ b o n u s " : 0 , " b o t _ t o t a l " : n u l l , " g _ t o t a l " : n u l l } , " o w n e r " : " e @ v i e " , " s t a t u s " : " r e a d y " , " r o u n d " : 0 , " l a s t P o s t " : 1 7 1 4 6 3 2 8 6 2 }

e@vie has started a new game with the following players:
e@vie

" S T A R T G A M E : t r u e "{ " g a m e I d " : " 1 7 1 4 6 3 2 6 7 2 " , " p l a y e r L i s t " : [ " e @ v i e " ] , " r o l l N u m b e r " : 0 , " c u r r e n t P l a y e r " : 0 , " d i c e " : { " f a c e s " : [ 0 , 0 , 0 , 0 , 0 ] , " r e r o l l " : [ t r u e , t r u e , t r u e , t r u e , t r u e ] } , " s c o r e 0 " : { " 1 " : n u l l , " 2 " : n u l l , " 3 " : n u l l , " 4 " : n u l l , " 5 " : n u l l , " 6 " : n u l l , " p l a y e r " : n u l l , " u p _ t o t a l " : n u l l , " b o n u s " : n u l l , " 3 k " : n u l l , " 4 k " : n u l l , " s s " : n u l l , " l s " : n u l l , " f h " : n u l l , " y a h _ t o k e n " : n u l l , " y " : n u l l , " c " : n u l l , " y a h _ b o n u s " : 0 , " b o t _ t o t a l " : n u l l , " g _ t o t a l " : n u l l } , " o w n e r " : " e @ v i e " , " s t a t u s " : " r e a d y " , " r o u n d " : 0 , " l a s t P o s t " : 1 7 1 4 6 3 2 6 7 2 }

in

Tower 11 Exterior
Nobu cocks his head at that, because this was something absolutely deep and clearly Important with a capital I. So he just holds your hand and *listens*. Eyes up, fully in the moment, active listening. You lay it out who Maul actually was, and Nobu's reordering things in his head to try and reconcile what you're telling him with the Statue that Bled. Considering he doesn't really know anything, this isn't hard!

You get to who Maul was, and he's nodding. Okay, an idealist. This is something that he can work with. You mention that the two of you had worked together much more than he knew and that an emotional connection was involved and Nobu's just nodding understandingly at that and taking it at face value.

"I can see why. You've certainly made an impression on me, so I'm not surprised that he had those feelings too. I mean, I wouldn't exactly say head over heels but I could get there real quick if you encourage it."

But then you're laying out that YOU have a doll chip and you see his eyes narrow thoughtfully and several pieces of information slot together in his brain. He's nodding along at that before giving your hand another reassuring squeeze with a warm smile.

Whatever you were expecting... Well, that's probably not going to happen! Nobu's calm and collected as you lay out that you'd apparently gone ahead and slept with Joaquim before he made mad crazy comments about going on the warpath before he died. And when you trail off about not knowing what you were supposed to do, he nods understandingly and gives you a bleak little smile.

"Well. That's a shit situation and no mistake, but you mentioning that Doll chip does make a few things clearer. I'm assuming that Maul worked for Paz? Like she was the boss, or was it something more? Because I could just see her ordering you to "take care of it" like you CAN just "take care" of feelings. I mean, shiiiiiit I've dealt with my own damn share of crushes and then some. Mine and other people's. All you can do is just like talk it out and see where it goes. Considering how tangled up you are about this, he must have meant quite a bit to you too. He was lucky to have known you."

feels warmth creep over me to help me sleep

sipping water.........i feel tiredness.....and slide to the floor and try to rest.......griping my blanket

I look around the hall the slips into the shadows the bells dining as I head back down the hall